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Xcalibur: The Lords of Sex

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Studio: Woodman Entertainment » Review by kobiata k » Review Date: 6/11/07

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Xcalibur 1: The Lords of Sex directed by Pierre Woodman

Pierre Woodman, through his own company, proves that he can still make an impact in the porn industry!

Running Length: 2 hrs 46 min

The Story:

Pierre Woodman is known for his epics that usually span 3 movies. In this first part of the trilogy, Woodman has adapted the story of Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table for porn.

The Sex:

Arthur and his Knights prepare battle with their enemies, the Saxons. The action scene is intense considering this is a porn film. Through the power of the Excalibur sword Arthur and his merry knights rout the Saxons. Most of the Saxons that survived either fled or were captured the three female Saxon warriors (Eufrat Tenka, Anita Slager, and Terenza Joy) who will have to spend their jail time as sex slaves. The orgy scene starring these sexy brunettes is not to be missed. The director sticks to what he knows best when capturing the orgy scene with a wide focus view to see all the action taking place to a closer view focusing on each girl . . . this is Pure Woodman style at its best. This wouldn't be a Woodman orgy scene without the nasty anal action. Finally, the ladies get what they deserve . . . three nice loads on their pretty faces. Meanwhile, one of the Saxon warriors (Natali di Angelo) retreats from the unsuccessful battle, but encounters Merlin on the way. She relaxes her guard when she finds out that Merlin just wants to have sex with her. Natali di Angelo is a cute blonde and she delivers a solid performance throughout . . . from the blowjob . . . to the anal . . . and finally to the cumshot!

Arthur decides to have a victory celebration at Mardock's residence where there's a lot of medieval pleasantries happening from the music to a fire-eater. This is yet another orgy scene and it's just as good or if not better than the first scene. There's anal and double penetrations involved ending in nice facials!

The next scene starts with Mardock scolding his wife since he thinks that she's barren and cannot bear children. Instead of comforting her, he drives her away crying like a little girl while he takes out his anger on his maids (Carla Cox and Jasmina Berber). The two ladies have at him and offer their mouths and holes for him to drown his frustration away!

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In another far-off region, Cruella (Boroka Balls) is a female despot ruling another kingdom. Two servants (Cynthia Moury and Vanessa Bliss) are at her sides waiting for her command. Her advisor tells her that her heirs and not her will rule the entire dominion. She doesn't like the news and scolds her advisor to leave while she forgets her anger by having a sapphic tryst with her servants. This is a nasty as it gets when it comes to girl/girl action when there's use of anal sex toys!

The next scene starts with Xena (Theodora Ferreri who resembles Helena Christensen) practicing her swordfighting skills on her way to talk with her father. It's a very nice action sequence where she swings the sword rather convincingly. She convinces her father that she has a plan to recover the Xcalibur sword. From hereon, it seems that Arthur is the enemy and Xena is the main protagonist. As soon as the father leaves, she sexually harasses her male advisor and tells him to lick her pussy. She calls on the two guards that she earlier trained with to join into the fray. The vaginal-friendly girl knows how to work it and the guys have fun fucking from daylight to sundown. Finally, the torrid scene ends with semen on her body and face!

Meanwhile, Arthur has commissioned Merlin to create a mysterious magic potion. Arthur sweets the deal for Merlin by bringing over one a buxom "virgin" (Mona Lee) for the two to sample. The blonde has no problem taking it in the ass or being double penetrated. In the end, her ass cheeks are dripping cum and her face is too! It's a nice scene, but it's hampered by the very fact that the scene was at night and outdoors.

The next scene stars the two contract girls for Woodman Entertainment, the former blonde Czech playboy playmate Caylian Curtis and the sexy brunette Divinity Love. In the movie Caylian plays a princess and Divinity plays her friend. The girl/girl action is quite tame compared to Boroka's scene. For the most part, they end up licking each other in the 69 position.

In the last scene, Xena devises a plan to hijack a carriage probably heading to Arthur's kingdom. The plan is executed to a "T." She pulls out the blonde female passenger and hands her over to her dirty henchmen for their pleasure while she hops on board the horse-drawn carriage. While all this happens, Caylian Curtis happens to be returning home after the lesbian session when she happens to witness the ambush from afar. This alerts her and she sprints back to her village probably reporting to her father what had happened. Meanwhile, the blonde prisoner is scared stiff, but as soon as cock surrounds her face, she wastes no time devouring them. The scene progresses to some hard anal as well as the hard double penetration. In the end, she takes their creamy loads on her face like a champ.

A/V: This is a big step up in terms of visual quality since the original source is HD as compared to Woodman's famous films for PRIVATE like Cape Town, The Pyramid, and Tatiana that were probably filmed with Hi8. But, like his prior movies, there is terrible vocal dubbing! I could probably understand why dubbing is used because most of their talent are from Eastern Europe and the ladies tend to speak English softly in their strong accents.

Extras: DISC 2 includes the trailers, photo galleries, interviews, and behind the scenes footage. On paper, the extras look solid, but when you actually view the major brunt of the extras, which is the hour long bts and the 30 min interviews, you suddenly realize that it's not so good. The two things I got out of the 1 hour bts is that Pierre Woodman is a very demanding director as he should be because he's at the top of his game and these epic productions force the talent to wait for hours on end. But, for the most part the bts just felt like an assistant had a thankless job of recording for the sake of recording. It would have been better if the bts was more focused. For instance, it would have been more interesting to get more insight from the director or it would be nice that Woodman would have acknowledged the bts filming. Now, the interviews . . . what a disaster. It was very difficult to comprehend either because the talent or translator spoke too softly or the set was too loud. I would recommend putting subtitles as was done in the early Woodman Private Castings X series. The photo galleries were mediocre at best and I would have expected full-size or almost full size photos. What I would recommend also is that a cast list with scene by scene breakdown would have been helpful.

Final Thoughts: Let me say that I am a big fan of Woodman's work ever since he started making great movies for PRIVATE. With that in mind, it logically follows that I would use Cape Town as the standard for comparison. The 2-part racy Cape Town movie was the best because it had it all . . . from the hard sex . . . to the location . . . and to the plot! Xcalibur 1 as compared to the Cape Town series doesn't have as a plot and doesn't have an exotic location like South Africa, but that's probably because this is a medieval story. However, there are still two more volumes in the trilogy and so the decision regarding the plot still remains to be seen. As it stands, I RECOMMEND this DVD.

~Ich mache mich jetzt auf die Socken!

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